Reading my words

Hello friends,

It has been quite a week, busy with doctor appointments and tests. 

But I will recap and tell you about it. 

I want to tell you this is going to be a format I hope to use to help me feel worthy again. No one's fault, just part of life. I spent my life in second and third place and now that I am all that is left, I am not sure who or what I am.  I am lost.

This will be part of my awakening journey.

Random thoughts, taking out the brain trash, so to say.

My week always starts on Monday or as I remember it's my Fosamax day.

I had an MRI on my spine and hips. I had tried to do it last week but my hip pain was too much and I tapped out after 32 minutes laying flat. So, the doctor sent me some pills to take prior to ease my pain and help me relax. 

They worked. 

But the rest of my day was a slow one.

It was so hot out, that staying inside reading blogs and napping was okay with me.

Poor hubs has been on watering duty all this week. 

It has been 104 degrees, 

one morning our patio thermometer read 116.

Tuesday was an office day. Gathering information and then sharing information. With 2 surgeries facing me and all the stuff they do to you once you reach that "age", there is a lot of files being shared. 

Again, it was too hot to go outside. The garden has been giving us beautiful tomatoes, cucumbers, and friends have been sharing eggs. I made a meal of tomato and bacon sandwiches (on homemade bread), boiled eggs, and fresh cucumber salad. I treated myself to a hot fudge sundae on the patio late that night.

Wednesday began early with my nuclear stress test. It was not fun. At its fastest, my heart only beat 77 bpm. I passed out and stopped breathing. It only lasted a minute and it began to get better and slowly the medicine began to fade. That was after 3 needle sticks to get a vein. It was another hot day so inside was better than outside.

I made tuna salad sandwiches on butter bread, with pickled beets and cold boiled eggs, and of course our gifts from our garden, sliced tomatoes and cucumbers.

Thursday I was blessed with thehubs running errands for myself and my Mom. We both got new walkers.  Mom is so happy! She needs hers for balance and I need mine up to and after the coming surgeries.

I took care of the insurance paperwork and I was shocked at the difference in the cost, insurance verses cash. Insurance $138.00 - cash $85, same walker, same day, same place. Humm....

Today is Friday.

Thehubs and I are not on the same page at the same time regarding our workload.  I have been slowing down for a couple of years and spent a lot of my energy and time in trying to make our landscape easier to take care of as we age. We have a beautiful home that we built with the help of family. It sits on 2+ acres with one side of it being the family pond. Tons of weed eating, and mowing. Thehubs also mows the neighbors 5 acres and brushhogs the ditches along our roads.

He is 74 and I am 65.

I know I told him I would work in my gardens even if I had to work on my stomach with only one hand.  I don't want to give up gardening,

My body would like to clean one garden, not five.

PONDERING:

Jason Aldean's Song

"Try that in a small town"

click here to watch.

I live in a small rural town, 20 miles from any city.

We lie down dirt roads and river crossings.

It takes 20 to 30 minutes to get help from 911.

My need my neighbors and they need me.

We share food, time, kids, toys, rides, and more.

We go to church together; we go to school together.

We will protect each other.

I remember my grandmother lived in Los Angeles, California

and she walked each morning up to her local family-owned food market and bought her supplies of fresh fruit and meats for the day.

She lived right in the middle of traffic and noise but she had a neighborhood. A neighborhood that cared, neighbors that helped and shared and looked out for each other.  Neighbors who were proud to fly our American Flag in their yard.

WHAT HAS HAPPENED?

Moving On...

Positive thoughts for today: